The Best Laid Plans….

by Crystal N on December 27, 2005

Christmas come, christmas gone. Big sigh of relief, but not too big – I’ve still got new year and a birthday to get through next week. Signed myself up on the Biggest Loser Club for a challenge to do at least 2 hours of cardio a day this week, starting boxing day and ending with New Years – figured since I’d have the gym membership I asked my family to get me and would have to test it out, it would be a good chance. That, and it’s still kinda nothing compared to the 4-6hrs I WOULD have been putting in if they’d picked me (getting curious to see the people they did pick when the show airs in February, I must admit!)

Day 1 went well. Gym was closed, so I planned the 2 hours out around what I have at home, including a nice long walk. No problems there. Even got in some of the strength training I’ve not been doing as much as I should…

Just finished day 2 – you know what they say about the best laid plans of mice & men? Well, I suspect that I’ve got Murphy filling in for my regular guardian angel at the moment. Got 3 months gym subscription from my family instead of 2, which is great, but when I went along to set it up today they’d lost all my paperwork from my previous membership AND from the personal training I’d been doing there – no file whatsoever.

No worries, just filled out every form they had all over again, and got my little keychain tag – which they warned me are prone to breaking at the moment, so I might like to reinforce it. Oh, and since I’d already done 25 mins walking down the gym (it’s 45 all up both ways, with one direction downhill & the other back up) I planned out that I’d walk down for a warmup, use the bike, elliptical and stairwalker, maybe check out what else was there, then spend a nice half hour in the pool doing laps as a ‘cool down’ (in heatwave conditions here). Sounds like a plan, right?

Standing around filling out forms, of course, meant I had to warm up over again… Undeterred, I plugged my money into the locker and pulled out my towel to get started. Jumped on the elliptical walker, which had a heart rate monitor, cool. Programmed it, only to find it had an upper limit of 20m. Oh well, good enough for a warm up, and I can do more on the bike. Not. It, too, had a limit of 20m. I did discover that you can add an extra 5m on the end for ‘cooldown’ and just ignore the fact that you’re supposed to be cooling down, so all up I got 50m on those two. Oh, and the heart rate monitor isn’t on the bike (or the treadmill, or most anything else) but if I buy one of those expensive Polar HR monitor straps it will read it for me. Hmm, just as well my birthday’s coming up soon…

Those two down, I decided to have a go on the rower. Leaving aside the fact that someone at 283lb is NOT the most graceful person to watch getting down to a machine set at floor level, then to manipulate herself into straps and seat and somehow lean forward far enough to grab the bar, THEN lean even further forward to work the menu screen, I think I did quite well. Picked the first preset routine, which turned out to be 2000m. Of which I did approximately 250, before I decided that I really need to get myself a little more room for my legs to bend up without being bounced back by belly before I give that one a go again (in public at least).

Righto, well, still want to get at least one more machine in so I’m not too long in the pool – that’s my fun activity so I don’t want to force myself to do so much of it that I lose interest. The stairmaster’s just about the only thing left, aside from the treadmill. With a guy on there who was running a la olympics for a solid 20m, I wasn’t about to encourage any comparisons, so that’s out! Granted, I’ve never managed to do more than 3 mins on the stairmaster without gasping for air like a stranded fish, but hey, I’ll give it a go. Jumped on, thinking I’d give myself a goal of 5 mins to aim for – oops, there’s a LOWER limit on this one too! Choice of any number between 10 and 20 mins. Pick 10, and jump off half way, becomes the plan.

You would not believe how many mind tricks I came up with to stay on that machine for a personal best record of 5 mins. Considering it was only a year ago I couldnt’ go up stairs at all without crutches, after I hurt my knee again, I think I did pretty well, too. I climbed 10 storeys, pretending it was a challenge and there was a helicopter at the top with some incredible prize, trying to convince myself that I was leaving a bit of myself behind at every floor so I had to do as many as I could – you name it, I tried it. I may have got to the point that nobody on the machines around me could hear the music over my panting and puffing, but hey, I MADE IT!!! 5 minutes down. Next goal will be 6. Gotta take these things in stages – I’m way faster on the bike than I was when I started already, so it shouldnt’ take long…

Red faced and dripping (and not from my trip to the water fountain, either) I go back to my locker to pull out my stuff for the pool. Off I go. Ten past 4, and it closes at 5, so reckon I’ve timed it well. Walk through the entry, duck into the showers, hose myself down and haul myself into the lycra one-piece I got myself for this summer (I know I wanted the athletic back so it wouldn’t come off in the pool, but little did I know how hard that makes it to get ON – especially when wet…), hiked up the back of it to something resembling modesty and head out with my towel. As I get up to the steps, another staff member approaches, with the killer of all obvious statements – “you’re not going IN, are you???” Thinking she was worried about getting home at 5, I explain that I’m just doing a cool down routine, and won’t be long in the pool. Turns out that wasn’t it at all. Some kid was in there and left a nice little surprise for them, which meant they had to close it early and clean the whole thing. Joy! They have a policy that non-toilet-trained kids are supposed to be in those swim nappies, guess somebody didn’t read it…

Oh well, I’m all gymmed out, dressed in cossies and no pool to swim in, guess it’s just as well that I’m almost up to the 2 hrs without it. I throw my gym gear back on (no point in going back into the shower again) and figure out that a walk home should just about put me there, and then I can throw in a brisk walk down to the supermarket where I need to pick up some aerogard insect repellant – the flies have been absolutely EATING me all day. They did on the way down there, too. On the way out the door, I pull up to the seats they have there, unload the spray, and drench myself on it (I got the extra potent version). My arms and neck were not disturbed by flies all the way home. Unfortunately, they did discover that I hadn’t got the face cream and covered my forehead with it, but at least I got some arm exercises in shooing them away all day!!! Oops, nearly forgot – discovered a couple of great home exercise dvds at the christmas sale in David Jones on the way down there – maybe not such a good idea to rely entirely on the gym after all…


{ 1 comment… read it below or add one }

LeighAnn December 29, 2005 at 5:02 am

You did so great! I am so proud of you…..after me just eating a Mc Donalds cheeseburger! bleck.


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