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Living Your Personal Truth

by Crystal on October 3, 2009

Are your passions falling prey to your partnerships?

The easy path in a relationship to let your own interests slide, in favour of doing more of the things you both enjoy.  A new “partnered” person emerges with all new friends, favourite places & activities (‘ours’ vs his or hers), and only slightly overlapping interests to the ones you used to have.   Over time, though, this eats away at you.  It becomes a sacrifice of yourself and who you are.

How surprising is it, then, that the things you used to be passionate about no longer fit quite so well with who you’ve become?

Lately it’s become more obvious to me that when I chase my own interests, I’m pushing away from this ‘merged identity’.  It’s not easy.  It feels like running uphill.  But it’s those times when I chase what’s important to me, that I feel most alive, energised and most in alignment with who I really am.

Ironically, it’s also those times when I’m distinctly NOT choosing my actions as ‘half of the relationship’, that I find myself having the most to offer, emotionally.  In the end we either argue (and uncover a new level of honesty and truth to each other) or get a new level of acceptance of each other, becoming closer than ever.

It’s ironic, really.  When you change to suit the relationship, you’re no longer the person your partner chose to be with, and you end up killing it off a little…  When you stand up for your truth – even against what seems to be right for your partnership – you create the opportunity to develop a deeper bond.

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